topi berfikir aku

an insignificant chat over a movie could probably and actually had happened, create an immoral perception of what life could have and should have been. we avoid talking and dealing with such situation where our feet keep losing ground and there are no more sky to reassuringly gaze upon. who would want to be in the wrong. oh yes, of course there are times when we indulge the sweet moments of merry carelessness. however, these moments, i believe, should remain as a periodic episode and not habitual.

a dear friend was worried one day over his excessive (according to him) self-worth. aren’t we all, posses self-worth, though to a different degree and somehow constructively it helps us to pull that extra effort on achieving or proving that we are at a certain par to self or others which doesn’t really matter actually if you are ignorant to other people’s perception and lashing gossips OR harmfully be a megalomaniac as such were born to be where everyone is below us in every manner and character which is evidently a leery occurrence as i’ve yet to meet a well-rounded person who is perfect in every thing he/she does or will be engaged upon and i believe neither do you, my readers, thus that make a bigger circle of people who has the possibility of meeting such a megalomaniac person.

126 words in a sentence, hah beat that! muahahahah….

erm okay. the point i am trying to make is what the title indicates. we worry and are cautious over this and that. you keep worrying whether your life is worth living and wonder why you still lead a miserable and lonely life. you worry whether your superior might appreciate your arduous time spent on that assignment. you are cautious about your life-partner of 20 years old whereabouts. i worry about my life and existence of spending and sharing with that significant opposite sex, among other things.

it is not to say that we should not worry. a little worry is good, it keeps us on our toes. however, we should always remind ourselves that nothing is eternal when it comes to humans and our being. don’t we always associate immortality with the period of where we are given borrowed time to breath? that is rightfully where it should be BUT we often fail to remember that other aspect in life is earthly either. happiness. sadness. that degree of loyalty. that intensity of love. trust. loneliness. merriment. etceteras.

so, why bother worrying about anything at all if nothing is going to last and just live life as it comes, right? because life is entrusted to us from God. it is such an honor to be human alone. being humane to ourselves and others and to manage the responsibility and put effort in everything we do while we’re still here and be grateful with what we have and redha to what we have lost. like what mamat wangi posted on bulletin board; God will never take away something without giving you something better to take its place. sedikit tugasan dari Allah untuk berusaha dalam apa jua yang kita lakukan. even if nothing will not last, the least we could do is to attempt in sustaining and doting what we have.

what more do you need?

so come, kiss my lips of wine…..err, coffee ;P

human was born gullible. growing up supposedly teaches us to be readier and smarter than before. however, the extent to which the before have occurred could never be measured, i believe. that’s why falling is inevitable. the stairs keep doing spiral skids and give steely stance and periodically fun sliding. the degree of where one rightfully stands in their world is much more complicated that understanding why you are reading this and i’m the one who is initiating the exchange.

a simple effort of demeaning someone’s character whose writing has no capital letters is as easy as burbling out irrelevant theory of Freud’s to an ignorant tot, all poise and breezy. but it’s an effort nevertheless.

and never leave hatred and confusion built up in you so long that only beady eyed plush toys by the bed could hear and care for your despair. those eyes, knowing and menacing all the same. make you wonder if there’s a window from in there to the world. but who are you again, for all the attention you imagine you should get.

when others wholeheartedly believe and voice it, though possible only in public eye or in presence of a higher authority in relevance of maintaining their own social persona, that you are some what a cut above the rest and that means thousands other beings your age who supposedly excel in their fields too, why should there be a prior ‘get-together’ if not to justly assist cum persuade these so called a-cut-above group. such tremendous struggle to uphold what has never been. such optimism to drearily keep. can’t wait for the drama.

would like to quote an applicable something for the present mood;

bukan aku marah kosong